To: Monsieur E. Montero

 

 

 

You see if I opt to give you an entirely private story it would be a bit complex for me. No, I am not going around the bush and making excuses. By complex, it would mean, you could have pinpointed a bit more specific not just “personal change”. There’s a whole lot of pages in my life, like anyone else, to choose from. On the other hand, if I would merely focus on “world change” this would become a rather political piece. Given the fact that I would indulge in it but in a more fashionable sense, it would result to a headache of a speech (headache to the reader/listener not to me).

 

I decided then to share to you a mixture of both.

 

I do not know if you have dropped by my account and came by incidentally with one of my verses quoted like this, “To judge others is to know the difference between critique and criticize”. Actually, it has been one of my principles ever since and I came to share it in IG during one afternoon when I had this afternoon tea with an acquaintance, a friend – someone who considers me as her “living diary”. Simply put, she is one my little wards / babies. I always tell my friends to just ring me up beforehand and if I could afford I’ll make time for them. She is the type to call me for a cup of tea to rant everything out. That time, she first and foremost sat down to ask for background reference and tips on how to deliver a thesis defence. After asking her a couple of questions, I deduced it has to start with her group as a group and as an individual. And so, she was ranting about her thesis group primarily. I had to reiterate a couple of things to her about leadership and facilitation, about interpersonal approach and nurturing-people tactics. Well, she said, yes, she does all those all the time and insisted that she was being patient and open-minded. Well, I doubt the magnitude of those two qualities, however. So I quipped for her to have more (lots and lots of) patience and cultivate trust. She has a long long way to go to be able to understand what I’m talking about. Being pissed off is normal, well normal to most people. And it’s all right to let it all out and rant. It depends on the circumstances, however.

 

That happens to me too. But, I manage not to be most of the time. It is a must that someone who leads must know the depth of knowing, understanding, and handling things. One must know not the grasp, not how to grasp, not what to grasp, but one must know the little pecks of the grasp in order to know the 5W’s of grasp. Grasping situations.

 

It is important to be calm in order to think clearly.

 

You see. Not to brag, but I have always been like this ever since I was a child even if I had multiple phases too.

 

I was a very obedient-to-every-rule-and-regulations-and-goody-goody-two-shoes child. But, I wasn’t dumb. I may have my own ignorance or innocence though. I was already both a child and not a child. As a result, I had gained lots of self-proclaimed so-called adversaries. Yet, I could easily handle different concerns / issues. And then, I became a rebellious child. Rebellious in a sense that I was flirtatious and --toot-- and more than flirtatious with someone who I was only mutually attached with (we weren’t in any formal relationship). Only that though. I hope you could expand your imagination because I will not further explain. Haha. My apologies. (Half-meant). That went on for a year. Breaking ties with many people with only a few having been rekindled. The main things that were only mainly affected was my relationship with people. My hierarchal status was the same. My academic status was the same. My insights on my falling apart but not nearly family was the same. My hobbies were the same. It was only my socializing with other people that went totally wrong. And that went on for years. However, my rebellion only lasted for a year. You could say, I managed to go on with my life. But what made me change but still the same? I already gave the simple yet not so simple answer. Could you answer it, E.?

 

Anyway, yes, we each have our own circumstances. Yes, we do have our own hardships and stories of struggles and success. But, in a world where history repeats even thru changing times, where principles are the same even thru differing concepts and views – it doesn’t matter how we differ or how we are alike. What matters is we change for the better no matter how many times there will be shocking opposing changes after triumphs. And what we need is to steer clear of the blur in front of us. Blurs exist to juxtapose clarity. There would be no clarity if there are no blurs.

 

For example, people always complain of how one is ruling. They see his smallest to biggest flaws. They would even reach to the point where they impeach the ruler. Yes, eradicating the (not ‘a&rsquo mistake is a necessity. However, if it goes on in an unending cycle – impeaching one ruler after another and would desire to be said ruler and then impeach again, wouldn’t that be rather the most idiotic biggest flaw? Why? Because people merely look at the errs. They say if they do not see the err and act upon and against it, then nothing will change. Well, yes, theoretically. But, hey, isn’t also theoretical to leap out of a cycle in order not to land up in another cycle but to create a forward path? That is what a ‘taking a step forward’ means. Why won’t people act upon the error, by seeing the good things, and then create a plan to weigh both and help it out with the ruler. They would just be tiring themselves out rallying and impeaching always. That isn’t entirely wrong. But, generally, people only end that not when the impeachment has taken place but when they have found something so shiny that they’ll be blinded again. The time spent for that could have been spent to making small improvements on their own or approach in a manner that both would come to a compromise.

 

It is already a fact that we could not help to make errors, but errors coexist with perfection. It is how we should manage both, not overlooking things and wasting time.    

 

And until now, I ponder, personally, and generally.

 

 

 

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If you want further clarifications or have questions in your mind, I don’t mind at all if you ask, E.

 

 

Filed under the frantic disciple counts, orinji no iru | hn. your pen's toilet